Politics: Vice President Osinbajo And His Banana

By Bamidele Ademola-Olateju

It has been a while since I wrote on politics on this wall. I have largely confined politics to my column in the Premium Times. Politics in Nigeria is changing and changing fast. The days of visiting marabouts, alfas, wolis and babaláwos for political fortunes are coming to an end. The days of burying goats, rams and cows to boost political chances are roaring to an end. The days of taking spiritual baths for success at the polls has ended. It is now an Era of realpolitik, the Era of taking your case to the Nigerian people. Nigerians are tired of political shenanigans and tomfoolery.

Winning an election from 2023 in this country will be about strategy and data mining. It will look more like boardroom decisions. Politicians who want to win are better off consulting me and others like me, who eat analysis for lunch, who predict trends and can mine and map data, than go to marabouts. Nigerians will elect hard-nosed populists who will deliver public goods but not a banana eating one. That trick is far too worn. Nigerians will love to see a visceral politician who they can relate with, who can be trusted, who has a track record of delivering on promises, not a high faluting speaker who is better suited to an auditorium full of egg heads.

The Vice President reminds me of that ineffable quote from China Achebe. He behaves like “the young antelope who danced herself lame when the main dance was yet to come.” Where is his political structure? If he’s leaning on Asiwaju, why did he botch the opportunity to visit him in London when it mattered? Was he in Ogun state during the state congress or has he left it to Amos ń and Dapo Abiodun? This man is not a politician. Banana cannot do it.

Someone should please tell him, the masquerade that dances too early in the day will become a spectator in the evening when the show starts or worse, when the big masquerades come out, he will be chased out of the arena. Eating banana like he did, is like monkeying around.

Friendly Warning: I am verified, I don’t do gbas gbos anymore. 🤣🤣🤣. I’m not arrand for fights in the comments. 😀

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