Nigeria’s Sacred Cows And The Rest Of Us…By Bola BOLAWOLE

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If I am to tell, I will say that Nigeria’s problems revolve around her sacred cows. Each and everyone of this country’s problems – be it corruption, insecurity, bad governance, infrastructure deficit, rigged elections, name it – they all revolve around and are traceable to sacred cows. If only we can find a way – or, better still, summon the courage – to cage our sacred cows, then and only then shall we be on the road to solving the myriad problems that confront us. But the snag is, who bells the cat?

Once upon a time, a mischief or colony of rats gathered to deliberate on one sore issue: The cat that steals in to kill and munch them. After much deliberations, a very smart rat came up with the novel idea that they should get a bell and tie it around the cat’s neck; so that rather than the cat stealthily stealing in on them, the jingles of the bell around its neck will announce its arrival and every rat will be alerted to hurry into their holes to hide.

Everyone clapped! Smart idea! The rats contributed money and bought a bell. Now came the time to implement their resolution: Who will go and tie the bell around the cat’s neck?

You will find this story in the Aesop fable titled “The Mice in Council.” What morals does it teach? That it is easier said than done! That proposing solutions is easier than executing them!

But it does not at all mean that it can never be done; only that bold – even if dangerous and high-risk – steps are needed to solve nagging problems. Acting alone may be futile while collective action stands a better chance of yielding the desired result. But even this carries a heavy caveat!

Once upon a time again in a village, the king’s mother was a witch and every night the witch cried, the next day a child died. The women got fed up and held a meeting where it was resolved that they must send a delegation to notify the king of their findings.

Taking a cue from “Who bells the cat?”, they decided to troop to the palace enmasse since no one was willing to volunteer to bear this very dangerous message. Before setting out for the palace, they rehearsed carefully how they would present their case before Kabiyesi.

One bold woman volunteered to lead. Once she says: “The king’s wife is a…”, all the other women should chorus “…witch!” They were to repeat this three times and then wait to see the king and his wife’s reaction. Fair enough!

The women booked an appointment to see the king. On the appointed day they put on their best attires and headed to the palace. The king and his wife, equally resplendent, sat on their thrones. The women sang and danced. Their spokesperson, a seasoned PR guru, came forward and praised the king and his wife, reeling out their achievements since the king mounted the throne of his ancestors. The king was happy and waved his horsetail in salutation; his wife, too, beamed with smiles.

Then came the moment of truth. The leader stepped forward, cleared her throat and screamed: “The king’s wife is a …” The silence that followed would wake the dead! She looked behind her; she also looked around her: Did they not hear her?

She shouted the same message again. Again, deafening silence answered her. She did that thrice as they had earlier agreed, but then she realised her colleagues had chickened out. Each time she looked back at her colleagues, they avoided meeting her bewildered gaze. Betrayal!

But thank God for wisdom. This woman quickly changed gear and put her car in reverse. She shouted “The king’s wife is illustrious!” And this time around her colleagues latched on to it! Everyone sang and danced. The king was happy. His wife, too.

The women, having chickened out when it mattered most, took their problem back home with drooped heads. They were too afraid to bell the cat. You may blame them, but speaking truth to power is not easy. Not everyone has the belly for rebellion.

Most people would rather suffer in silence and grumble when no one in particular is listening instead of marching in the streets and confronting their oppressors. In any society, those who have the stomach for “struggle” are usually not many; even at that, they are seen and regarded most times by the same people they are fighting to liberate as “trouble-makers!”

Everyone knows that Nigeria’s problems are its sacred cows – in practical and figurative terms – but who bells the cat? Throughout President Muhammadu Buhari’s eight ruinous years, Nigeria’s problems were the Fulani and their cows, which Nigerians were told must be treated better than human beings.

Prominent Fulanis in and out of government told us they value their cows more than they value human beings – and they acted it! They kidnapped, killed, raped, maimed, burned down entire villages, ravaged farmlands and destroyed crops in the name of feeding their cows. Large swathes of the country were laid desolate at the feet of the Fulani and their sacred cows.

Much of the problem of insecurity that has brought foreign troops into our country today is traceable to that. Notwithstanding, the Fulani and their cows still remain sacred because no one is willing – or ready, or able – to bell the cat!

If a man insists that his cow is sacred, you, of course, must know that he, himself, the owner of the cow, is super sacred! That is one of the problems this country is yet to come to terms with.

Some people from a section of this country see themselves as sacred cows; and, as if accepting this narrative, the other parts of the country defer to them! They say things that people from other parts of the country dare not say – and they get away with it. They do things that others would shiver at doing – and they walk away free from the scenes of blue murder, which they not only perpetrate in broad daylight but also stick in our faces! They dare you! And you dare not! They wield two deadly weapons: the tyranny of (orchestrated) numbers and the tyranny of violence! With these, they sow fear – and tears – in the land.

The confession by Nasir el-Rufai that they bugged or hacked the communication lines of the National Security Adviser is one recent example! If someone who is not a sacred cow said what that short-man devil said, do you think he would walk away free? Even after he was invited for questioning, they quickly released him as if his yansh must not touch ground at the EFCC office!

This man not only bluffed the security men who sought to arrest him at the airport, he also went ahead to make the damning disclosure that they possess the capacity to compromise the country’s security architecture! It immediately raises the question of how porous our security architecture is. It also calls into question the suitability of those manning it. True, then, is the saying that while the enemy lurks outside, the one who deals the real damage lies within!

Is this the reason why they are dying to have election results electronically transmitted so they can hack into the INEC system? When people are desperate, they do desperate things. Was this not how, in their desperation in 2014, they invited Fulani terrorists into the country and the debilitating impact of that is with us to this day?

Have you forgotten that the same man who made the revelation about that pernicious invitation is the same man in the ongoing hacking revelation?

Finally, US soldiers have set foot on our soil. If our government cannot help us, let help come from elsewhere is what many Nigerians are saying. Cry, the beloved country! Ideologically, I cannot support foreign troops on Nigerian – in fact, on any African – soil; least of all US troops! But we have seen enough to understand that our government cannot help us in this matter any more.

The sacred cows in the system will not let our government do the needful to end insecurity. Those helping to hack the government’s communication lines are most likely enemies within who are sabotaging any and every effort of this government to succeed. Think of all the reasons and sentiments involved: Politics, religion, ethnicity; not to talk of those doing it for pecuniary gains.

How will you know that we are all not on the same page on the issue of ending insurgency in the country? Just take a look at the kind of excuses some people are giving to counter the efforts by US lawmakers to see to it that the sacred cows who have contributed in one way or the other to the terrorism scourge are penalised! They are arguments that are, to say the least, jejune.

Did Rabiu Kwankwaso as governor of Kano state enact Sharia blasphemy law as alleged by the US lawmakers? Yes, he did! Has that law been the core of religious extremism-cum-terrorism in this country? Yes, it has! So, Kwankwaso has contributed to the problem; whether he did so under pressure or not is immaterial.

That there are worse offenders than him does not also exculpate him. What we need to do is point out the others who should be added to the list of those the US should penalise. The cloak of untouchability surrounding Nigeria’s sacred – even mad – cows must be shattered once and for all!

Former editor of PUNCH newspapers, Chairman of its Editorial Board and Deputy Editor-in-chief, BOLAWOLE was also the Managing Director/Editor-in-chief of The Westerner news magazine. He writes the ON THE LORD’S DAY column in the Sunday Tribune and TREASURES column in New Telegraph newspaper on Wednesdays. He is also a public affairs analyst on radio and television.